Tuesday, April 23, 2013

The Respect Dare by Nina Roesner


Ephesians 5:33 says, “Nevertheless let every one of you in particular so love his wife even as himself; and the wife see that she reverence her husband.” Paul's advice essentially explains some primary needs in a marriage. Most wives want to feel loved and most husbands want to be respected. Simply concept, difficult application. What does it really mean to respect your husband? Should you respect your husband even if he's lazy? What about if he's irresponsible and the electricity gets turned off? What if he doesn't deserve your respect? Nina Roesner challenges wives to take 40 days to learn to respect your husband – whether he deserves it or not.

The Respect Dare: 40 Days to a Deeper Connection with God and Your Husband by Nina Roesner is similar to The Love Dare, popularized by the Christian movie, Fireproof. It's hard for me to review The Respect Dare because I feel like it is a mixed bag. It has some awesome marital advice. There are things that I absolutely agree with and things that I want to implement into my own role as a wife. However, I felt like some of the example stories didn't resonate with authenticity. I don't doubt that they are true, but maybe in the retelling some of the genuineness got lost. I also didn't agree with some of the advice and the small snippets of Scripture supporting those pieces of advice weren't enough to convince me. I needed more explanation and to see how those verses really related to my marriage and personal walk with God.

I also felt like there were some mixed messages. One one hand, the author made it very clear that a wife does not need to stay in an abusive situation or become a doormat. On the other hand, there were several times that it seemed like the message was to respect your husband no matter what he does.... even if it means leaving your child with someone you don't feel is safe, or letting the power get turned off, etc. I understand that people sometimes need to learn by experiencing consequences, but I also believe that the wife's role as helpmate does not mean that you have to let yourself and your children suffer because of your husband's poor choices. In fact, I believe a wife has the responsibility to help her husband grow by respectfully being the “iron sharpening iron” and likewise for the husband.

Like I said, The Respect Dare had some great advice and some not-so-great advice, in my opinion. For that reason, I give it three stars – it's okay, but I just don't believe/agree with some of what's said.



Disclosure of Material Connection: I received this ebook free from the publisher. I was not required to write a positive review. The opinions I have expressed are my own. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255: "Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising."